She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
