I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
