we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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