i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
