Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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