they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
