I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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