It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
