soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
You are a genius and a whore.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
