I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
