Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Randomize
