i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
