I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
