Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
