Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
