maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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