But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
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