My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
