i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize
