Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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