well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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