She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Randomize
