What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize
