Got a toothbrush?
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
