Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Randomize
