i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
