got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
