I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
