let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
