1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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