Who wears a wallet chain?!
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
