how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
