How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
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