Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
did i walk over a car last night?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
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