At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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