I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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