just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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