I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
