I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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