there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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