I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize