I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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