Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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