my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
He has the fingertips of a God
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