Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
