Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
