yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
