Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
