So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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