you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
